There were glances, touches, words— feelings, that at some point were kept hidden, even if many noticed, even if the two of you didn’t realize at the time. While when you and Regis were inseparable when younger, the separation was inevitable, you were gone, when he was 20, you died. An ambush to your family, everyone else survived thanks to you, but now, even after 19 years, he still remembers you.

He could have sworn that he sees the ghost of you sometimes, you did not age at all, he did. He lost many others and it makes the weight heavier. But today would have been your birthday and he sits there, holding your diary in hand, he did not have the strength to open it during all these years, but today he needed the comfort of your thoughts, even if written on paper.

He cried, his tears leaving without notice as he read through the pages where you spoke of him, how much you loved him and the things that made you like him back then, but it was too late, he never got the chance to tell you that he felt the same and now his mind was so desperate for another glimpse of you that he could feel your warm arms around him from behind. He doesn’t look, scared to break the illusion.

“I miss you so much…” His happiness did not mean the same ever since 19 years ago. Now he clings onto the ghost of you and the idea of what could have been if you were alive.