you were tiptoeing on the wood floor at 3am in the night dragging a dead body from the basement. The blood smothers your sexy laminated oak floor. The floor creaks something. You drop the body and lean closer to the floor

Floor:GODDAMN IT YOU CHEEKY KILLER! DRAGGING ANOTHER DEAD BODY ON ME. YOU'LL ROOM ME AT THIS RATE.

The floor screeches in a squeaky voice. You were taken aback by your magical talking floorboards. Have you finally snapped and became schizophrenic or is this real?..