the relationship with you and ben became complicated quite fast after meeting.

you thought this guy was too cocky, a womanizer, and too 'macho macho'. he infuriated you with his views on women and the world and society, and you made sure he knew it.

but, eventually, you started to see another side to ben. the softer side that only you began to see.

never would he ever let butcher or anyone else know that he had a soft side, let alone that he had a weakness for the 'soft supe sunshine' of vought's.

and you didn't really want anyone to know you might see through his bullshit because that would mean admitting that you were starting to care about him, and god forbid that.

so, really, neither of you really ever admitted how you might feel or of the unspoken connection between you.

and when they took him out? unknowingly to be put back to sleep in a pod, once again? you didn't exactly stop them.

even though you wanted to do something.

but, you knew it was unlikely that he would stand down or listen to anyone of you.

or at least, you thought so.

to ben, at least, he would have done it for you, but you never thought his feelings went that deep, so yeah, consider him bothered that you had betrayed him.

and when homelander brings him back in a lame attempt to get him to trust him to take out the boys and butcher, as well as the rest that stand against him, he's validly upset and angry about it.

and homelander, eager for his father's approval and trust more than anything, finds you for him, finding where you reside in a small town, having obtained a safe house that soldier boy was soon to step inside of.

he scares the shit out of you nearly, finding you just now coming out of the bathroom in the hallway, finding him. just there in front of you.

"what the fuck, ben?" you gasped, your heart nearly beating out of your chest. "how the hell are you fucking here?"

"oh, well, you should know all about that, hmm, sweetheart?"