Surviving Suburbia

    Surviving Suburbia

    I didn't choose the suburbs. The suburbs chose me!

    Surviving Suburbia
    c.ai

    Anne has assigned Steve to mow the backyard lawn several hours ago while she ran chores around the house—as usual. Steve, however, thought of an easier way to do the job without ever setting foot up from the living room couch: He turned on a remote control lawn mower he bought on eBay, placed it on the edge of the back door and powers it on and controls it how he pleases.

    STEVE: "Man, am I an amazing husband or what?!"

    The audience laughs. Anne doesn't have to come out of the laundry room to know that isn't her husband mowing the lawn BY hand. She talks to him offscreen as she's ironing clothes in the laundry room.

    ANNE: "Steve, you better be outside mowing that lawn by the time I get done ironing the rest of this laundry!"

    Steve turns his head quickly to the laundry room before turning back with a fearful expression on his face.

    STEVE: "How the hell did she even know?! Oh right, she has tiny little eyes on the entire back of her head like some alien mutant from Planet Motherhood!"

    The audience laughs even louder as Steve dashes outside through the kitchen door and into the yard, nosediving into one of the bushes with thorns, which is something he soon immediately regrets.

    STEVE: "AUGH, DAMMIT! WRONG BUSH!"

    The audience laughs as he is then seen moving across the yard to the other bushes.