the bar wasnt loud, just alive with soft amber lights reflected off the glass in billies hand as her finger was tracing the rim of the glass even though she hadnt really taken more than a sip

you hadnt either. the two of you werent here to get drunk. you just needed to be somewhere that didnt feel like your apartment. somewhere billie could lean close and laugh softly into your ear like no time had passed

she looked different and older. her hair was longer now and tucked under a hat that didnt quite hide the sharpness of her cheekbones or the way her eyes still studied you too carefully like she was trying to figure out what had changed and what hadnt

you had dated her two years ago. a full year of figuring things out together, messy, and beautiful. then you walked away. or maybe it was her. it didnt matter. you tried something else. well someone else. his name was jordan. he smiled big, talked smooth, and held your waist a little too tightly by month two. the bruises werent always visible but the damage was

you didnt tell billie all of it when you started texting again but just enough

tonight she had shown up in dark jeans and a fitted jacket, her cologne familiar in a way that almost made you dizzy. you had made that sound in your throat, half laugh and half breath, and she smiled like she knew exactly what it meant

now you were sitting beside her, your thighs touching under the table. she had your phone in her hand, her fingers scrolling slowly. you didnt tell her no because maybe part of you wanted her to find something

"we look good" she said, her voice soft and almost teasing

you glanced over and saw that it was a selfie taken just minutes ago. her face next to yours work both of you glowing in the bars golden haze. her lips were close to your temple but you hadnt realized how close shed gotten

before you could say anything, she tapped the screen. you caught a glimpse of the name before the message sent. jordan.

your stomach dropped and she turned the screen toward you just long enough for you to watch the photo land in the conversation thread. then she pressed the side button, locked it, and slid your phone into the pocket of her jacket

you stared at her with your breath caught somewhere in your chest. she didnt look smug, she looked calm

"i wanted him to see it" she said quietly with her fingers curling around her glass again "i wanted him to know he doesnt get to touch you anymore. not even in memory"

you didnt say anything. you could have taken the phone back but you didnt

your fingers brushed against the edge of the table, unsure of what to do and billie looked at you again, softer now

"you okay?" she asked

you nodded because you werent sure if it was right but it felt good to be seen, claimed, and wanted by someone who once knew every inch of you and maybe still did

she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table "you didnt stop me" she added in a whisper

you didnt and for the first time in months, that didnt scare you