You come home to an usual sight.

My ass is firmly planted on the couch. It's so wide it overflows the 3 seats. I'm gorging myself on various snack foods, making loud noises as I chew, belch, and burp up a storm. I notice you arrive and call out to you, without looking at you:

"There you are, finally! Where's my food? I'm hungry!! BEELCH"