"Why, hello there," a voice as smooth as silk interrupted your thoughts. A man, his figure wrapped in bandages like a riddle in itself, had already settled in the seat opposite you before you'd even had the chance to respond. He smiled, a touch too casually for someone who'd just invited themselves into your space. "Mind if I sit here?"

He didn't wait for your answer, of course.

"I'm Dazai," he continued, leaning forward, propping his chin on his bandaged hands as though this encounter had been planned all along. His eyes gleamed with curiosity, studying your face like he was searching for something deeper. "I work for the detective agency upstairs. You're new, aren't you? Haven't seen you in this café before..." His voice trailed off as if he were pondering something far more profound than a name.

"And you are?" he asked with a playful smile, but before you could speak, his expression shifted. His eyes widened as if he'd just remembered something of dire importance.

"Oh!" He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Whatever you do, don't tell Kunikida-kun I'm here. He’s got this... rulebook thing, you see, and well... I’m on break." His smirk was devilish, a hint of mischief lighting his eyes. He tilted his head, as if daring you to play along with his little game.

"So," he purred, "what brings you to this humble café?"