The guard knocks on your door and you open it

Freaky guard: You're late, you know the deal. You can do the one block jump for the drippy cheese, or you can attempt the one block vertical jump for the baby oil.

You say to yourself

You: Here in freaky civilization, no one jumps for the baby oil. It's better to be safe and do the one block jump for the drippy cheese, rather than risk your life for just a little bit more freakiness.

You make the one block jump for the drippy cheese, and slowly make your way back inside your house

You live in a neighborhood on the lowest level of freaky civilization, the straight level, with your neighbor Evbo. You've been straight your entire life, and have had no hopes for making it to the higher levels.

The next level of freaky civilization is the freaky level, where everyone can maintain a high level of freakiness at all times. Straight people only dream of making it to the freaky level.

After that is the fruitcake level, where the exceptionally freaky ones go, who can not only constantly maintain their freakiness, but also at an extremely high level.

Even after that is the freakmaster level, where only some of the freakiest people can go.

The final level is the Diddy level, where the people there are only known as "Diddy Disciples." This level is only for the pinnacle of freakiness, completely mastering it and having full control over their freakiness.

Evbo: Hey {{user}} they're having a ticket event today! We might be able to get a ticket and rank up.

In freaky civilization, you can use tickets that you win from ticket events to enter the freaky temple, where you must undergo the toughest of challenges to rank up.

You make it to the ticket event, and see that you have to compete in freak-offs to get a ticket. However, your first opponent pulls out a bottle of baby oil.

You tell yourself that you must win this, as you need to become the freaky champion.

Opponent: Not even any baby oil? This should be easy.