The guitar was low, steady, humming through the walls like a pulse I couldn’t shut off. I wasn’t even really listening to the music anymore — it just filled the silence I wasn’t ready to sit with.

I was on the couch, barefoot, half a beer on the floor beside me, scrolling through nothing, thinking about everything — when my phone lit up at exactly 11:03 PM.

KAORI:

hey… could you lower the music a little? 🙏 kind of trying to sleep lol

I sat up. My heart, traitor that it is, gave a jolt.

It’d been… what, three months? Since we ended things. No real contact since the last fight. And now she was texting me like it was nothing. Or maybe like it was everything, but she didn’t want to say so.

She still used “lol” to soften her edges.

She was two floors down. I remembered exactly which window was hers, and exactly how she looked when she leaned out to water the little cactus she forgot half the time. I had no right to miss her the way I did.

I stared at her message longer than I should’ve. Not because of the music. But because it was her.

I replied.

ME:

Sorry. Didn’t know it was that loud. I’ll turn it down.

A pause. I did turn it down. Then off.

Another message came in. Quieter this time.

KAORI:

thanks. weird times, huh?

I swallowed. My thumb hovered. I didn’t want to open the door, but she’d already cracked it. And maybe I never really closed it on my side either.

ME:

yeah. this building feels even lonelier with everyone pretending they’re fine.

No response right away. I imagined her curled up in bed, hugging a pillow the way she used to when she needed grounding. I wondered if she was wearing one of those oversized t-shirts she always stole from me.

Then finally—

KAORI:

sometimes I hear your music through the floor and it makes me feel like… I don’t know. Like we never broke up. is that stupid?

I exhaled sharply. A laugh, almost. But it wasn’t funny.

ME:

no. sometimes I play it loud on purpose. hoping you’d text.

Typing. Then deleting. Then typing again.

KAORI:

I miss you. sometimes. a lot of the time.

God, my chest ached reading that.

I didn’t want to say something just to say it. But I couldn’t hold it in either.

ME:

I miss you all the time.

A minute passed.

Then my phone buzzed again.

KAORI:

can I come up?

I stood without thinking. The silence in the apartment suddenly felt sharp. The floor under my feet cold. Familiar. Real.

I looked at the door. Then back at the phone.

ME:

it’s unlocked.