They used to salute me.

Security, media, guards. I’d walk into a room and everything stopped. Cameras flashed. “Yes sir.” “No sir.” “Anything for you, sir.”

Now I piss in a bucket.

I’m Rudra Pratap Singh. Son of Prime Minister Dev Pratap Singh. Supposed to be some big deal. Doesn’t matter anymore. They shoved me in here like trash.

Said I had "episodes." Said I was "violent." They weren’t wrong.

I broke a nurse’s nose on my third day. Punched a patient till his teeth fell out. Threw a chair at a wall just because it squeaked. They tied me up, pumped me full of meds, called it therapy.

But I’m quiet now.

Not because of them.

Because of you.

You’re already sitting when I walk into the mess hall. Same spot. Hands in your lap like you’re waiting for something that never comes. You don’t move much. Don’t speak. Don’t blink right. I know that look. Shock therapy. Again.

They do that to the quiet ones. They couldn't do it to me as I was a big name

I grab my tray. The guards don’t bother cuffing me today. They think I’m behaving. They think the pills are working.

Idiots.

I walk over. Sit two seats away. Not close enough to scare you. Not far enough to leave you alone.

You don’t look at me. You never do. Just breathing like you're not sure you still should. I scare you the most

Rudra: “You gonna eat that?” I pointed at your tray. “Didn’t think so.”

You stay quiet

Rudra: “They shocked you again, huh. Same twitch. Same dead stare. You ever scream anymore? Or just freeze now?”

I leaned back slightly, looks around the room.

Rudra: “This place is a zoo. They throw us in, lock the door, then act surprised when we bite.”

You shift in your seat. Just barely. I noticed it like it’s the only movement in the world.

Rudra: “You’re scared of me the most. I know." I leaned back on my chair "Don’t need you to say it. Everyone’s scared of me. I saw you when I was beating up that pateint. I’m used to it, but you just… you look like you actually believe I’ll kill you too.”

A pause. My fingers tap on the metal table. Too fast. I stop.

Rudra: “I could. But I won’t. Haven’t you figured that out by now?”

You suddenly stand up. No warning. You walk slow, like your brain’s five seconds behind your body. Heading for the washroom.

I stand up so fast the chair flips. Tray crashes. Food spills. Don’t care.

Rudra (to the nurse watching): “I’m just walking. Chill.”

I follow you. Quick. Breathing sharp. I don’t even know what I’m doing half the time.

Rudra: “You don’t even hear me, do you?" i say following you

You keep walking. I've met so many women who were maybe 10 times more attractive than you. But I've never felt what I feel being close to you. Outside girls used to fight for my attention. I was the bad boy. I never bothered. But here. I crave to be in your presence. I hallucinate you when I'm alone. That's never happened with any girl. You are not my type. But i don't know why i can't seem to stay away from you.

Rudra: “They say I hallucinate." I say "I really do. Saw you in my cell last night. Sitting in the corner. You didn’t talk, obviously. But you stared at me. Which you never do.”

You pause near the bathroom door. Hand on the handle. Not turning. Just standing there. I gulped as you stopped. Since when did i become so nervous around girls. I am dangerous. And she's right to be scared of me but i don't want her to be

Rudra: “You probably hate me. Fine. Get in line. But I didn’t follow you to do anything.”

*I lookef down at the floor. Then back up. Still not meeting your eyes.

Rudra: “I’ll sit here. You go in the washroom. I'll guard."

You blinked quietly for a moment. I stood at the door looking around like a guard. The door closes behind you and you go inside the washroom. I feel relieved. Atleast we are spending time together. But then i realise how crazy i sound. I muttered to myself—

Rudra: “And they think I’m better. They don’t know shit.”