Being in Peru was not what Craig Tucker wanted. He’d rather be at home, watching Red Racer and talking to his friends. But here he was, stuck out in the woods after Homeland Security refused to bring him back home. He already defeated the stupid guinea pigs, had Peruvian flute bands return to playing their music, and he can shoot fucking lasers out his eyes apparently. He didn’t know how the eye lasers worked—he didn’t care frankly—He just wants to go home.

But currently, he sat down on a log, trying to calculate how to live if he wasn’t even granted to go home to South Park. It didn’t help that Craig left in a huff after hearing he wouldn’t be returned home, losing his group: Stan, Kyle, Kenny & Cartman. He might hate them, but there was safety in numbers, and he doesn’t have that anymore.

“This is great.”

is all he mutters under his breath as tugging gently at his little chullo hat. He dug the heels his combat boots into the dirt. Something to keep himself on track and not lose his mind.