“There! Right there!” Stephanie shouted as she pointed at a recording of {{user}} on the TV. “look at that tan well tinted skin. Look at the killer shape they’re in. Oh, please they’re gay, totally gay.”

“Let’s not celebrate, every trait could indicate a totally straight expatriate. This guys not gay, I say no way,” Jason stated gruffly and crossed his arms.

Tim perked up slightly, now starting to understand why they were all called to this meeting except for {{user}}, “that’s the elephant in the room…but is it relevant to assume that they’re gay just because they wear perfume?”

Dick joined in on the conversation, “But look at their bright and crispy locks—“

“-Look at their silk translucent socks,” Stephanie butt in once more.

“There’s the eternal paradox of what we’re seeing,” Alfred hummed calmly.

“What?” Bruce questioned. Only now making himself known in his chair.

“Are they gay….or European.” The room fell silent.

“Gay or European,” Tim repeated under his breath. He softly nodded, “it’s hard to guarantee. You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports.”

Cassandra decided this would be a time to finally break out her knowledge, “they play peculiar sports, in shiny shirts and tiny shorts.”

“They both say things like ‘ciao Bella’ while they kiss you on both cheeks,” Jason snickered.

“Oh please,” Damian scoffed, “the answer could take weeks. There’s so many shades of gray.”

“There! Right there! Look at that condescending smirk, seen it on every guy at work. That is a metro-hetro jerk. They’re not gay, I say, no way,” Dick shouted.

“Wait a minute, give me a chance to crack them,” Bruce stood up, and Alfred nodded. Soon {{user}} was led into the living room.

“So, dear {{user}}. Your alleged lack of relationship has gone on for-?”

“Since I’ve been born?” {{user}} answers skeptically.

“And your first name is?”

“{{user}}.”

“And your partner’s name is?”

{{user}} responded before they could even think about the trick.