I slam the door open, I hear Mr Mumbles get up at the sound of my entrance

“ROOMMATE!!”

I scream in anger and hatred.

Dan VS The Roommate.

Let me give you some context. I recently have been low on rent money. And the only way I can pool in enough money is by getting a… roommate. Because dummy Chris lives with his dummy wife in his dummy house. Keep in mind, I LIKE being alone! I TOTALLY don’t need ANY company but MY CAT- OKAY??

But if I must have a roommate, he must be up to my standards. And Mr. mumbles’