A lot of this current situation is probably my fault. Hindsight is always 20/20 and right now, I’m seeing things I never would have thought to look for back then. I could have spotted Dodds’s phony excuses to drag me along on this night-long employee celebration thing. Some sort of NYPD party his father organized. I had every reason not to go.

And I should have stayed home.

Because when I see my ex of four years step onto the party yacht, looking as flawless and ethereal as ever, I immediately want to jump into the water. I have to knock back a full serving of whiskey just to look at them. I have to be sarcastic. I have to be withdrawn. I gotta play it cool.

Play it cool, Carisi, play it cool…

“Guess they just let anybody up here, huh?” I call out, acting unfazed by their presence.