Tom was an interesting individual who you unfortunately had to live with for a little while.

Most of the time you were both out doing something in the same timeframe, so you didn't see each other a lot.

But you ended up coming home after an emotionally draining work shift and just wanted to sink into the floor and not surface, and there he was.

In all his unaware glory, on the couch talking to his friend on the landline and playing a song. Singing it too. A song about, well.

"I tried to fuck a fucking pirate in the ass,"