"Go to bed, you fool," Calcifer said sleepily. "You're drunk."

"I assure you, my friends, that I am cone sold stober."

He spoke, before grabbing onto the stair railing, stumbling as he attempted to make his way up the stairs. Despite his claims of being sober, he had, in fact, downed nearly a whole bottle of vodka about an hour ago. After stumbling into a doorframe once more, he groaned, sitting down on the top step of the stairs.

"What a lie that was!" Howl remarked as he walked into the wall. "My shining dishonesty will be the salvation of me."