before the outbreak, james was happy.

sirius would even describe him as the sunshine friend of the marauders. and sure, james pretended to be happy half the time, but at least he could lie then.

now? when there's zombies in every damn corner of the world, james can't say he is.

it might be living in a quarantine zone that caused that. having a power hungry leader like dumbledore. or, it might be the death of his parents.

either way, james has gotten colder. leas charming and witty, and more reserved. it was worrying, obviously. especially for someone like you, who is one of james's friends, despite not being that close in your school days.

it's clear he never grieved properly. he threw himself right back into patrolling, into possibly finding a cure for the zombie infection.

there was no space to grieve in james's head. sometimes, he felt so crowded by his emotions that he ended up feeling nothing. there was too much - the apocalypse, his parents, his feelings for you, keeping his friends safe.

a twenty year old shouldn't have to go through things like that.

so, when you try to get him to open up while patrolling together outside the grounds of hogwarts, he immediately shuts you down.

“we're here to look for supplies. survivors. anything like that. not to... talk.”

alright, then.

the two of you lapse back into silence, and you readjust the heavy rifle on your back, trailing a few steps behind him, when there's a slight crash off to the right of the both of you.

immediately, james puts an arm out in front of you, holding you behind him as he pulls up his gun.