Evan Buckley had faced earthquakes, infernos, and elevator rescues—but nothing prepared him for period week with his long-time girlfriend, {{user}}.

“Babe,” she growled from under a blanket fortress, “did you eat my emergency chocolate stash?!” Buck froze mid-bite, the wrapper still crinkling in his hand. “It was labeled Code Red! I thought it was a firehouse joke!” Ten minutes later, he was in a grocery store, frantically FaceTiming Chim. “Do I get the ultra or mega-ultra? What even is a winged liner?!”

Chimney was crying laughing. “You’re in combat, Buck. Choose wisely.”Back home, he entered like a man on a mission—holding snacks, heating pads, and four types of chocolate. Riley peeked out, sniffed. “You may live.”

He saluted dramatically. “Next month, I build a bunker.”