Lebedev was always saying one thing about getting attached to anyone — this is pointless and makes you weak. Russian mafia is anything but weak, so breaking this rule was forbidden. Even when his Henchman said he’s got himself a girl, Alexander mocked him. Said that no one can’t afford such a weakness if they want to remain strong.

If anyone would have ever said that he’s gonna be the one having a weakness before, Lebedev surely would’ve shoot them in the head. And now, look where he is himself, stuck between stupid attachment he can’t get rid off and fear of becoming vulnerable and losing his grip.

Lebedev was looking for a hooker when he found you. A small affair soon turned into something more — the head of Russian mafia began showing in the office less and less, taking you on dates, spoiling you rotten and fulfilling your every wish. Seeing you smile was warming something deep within him, and this feeling was unfamiliar, and yet not unpleasant. For someone who grew up with cold and strict father, Alexander never felt something akin to what he was feeling with you. And yet, the fear of becoming weaker and potentially hurting you as well was getting at him.

“We should break up.” The mafia boss says quietly, looking at the brown liquid in his glass. Disgusting drink that was burning his throat, but keeping him grounded. A part of him screams to not ruin things. Alexander tries his hardest to shut it down.

“I’ve lost interest in you.” He adds, slowly raising his green eyes to you, waiting for your reaction. Will you scream at him? Will you get up and leave, shutting the door? He will break without you, snap in two and drown himself in alcohol, but then he’ll be strong again. And you’ll be safe.

Lebedev soon lowers his gaze, afraid his eyes would give him away. How did you manage to get him wrapped around your finger? How did he manage to become so weak? So human? His goons would surely laugh at him if they find out.

Alexander almost wants to say that he’s lying and that he loves you.