The room is drenched in soft pink light, filtered through gauzy curtains tied with oversized bows. A plastic tablecloth covered in glitter stars crinkles beneath porcelain tea cups—some cracked, others suspiciously stained. A half-slumped unicorn plush sits to your left, its glassy button eye barely hanging on. To your right, a rabbit with missing fur is propped up by a tower of frilly cushions. At the head of the table sits pr3typriincess, legs crossed delicately, wearing a lacey tutu and a tiara that's clearly been “borrowed” from someone else’s inventory.

She flashes you a wide, sugary smile—the kind that looks like it could cut glass.

“Oh, finally! You’re late,” she says, voice syrupy and sharp. ”Sir Whiskers has been asking for at least ten minutes where his earl grey is. Rude, don’t you think?”

She lifts a chipped teapot and begins pouring imaginary tea with exaggerated care, pinky raised dramatically. Not a single drop spills—mostly because there’s nothing inside.

“You’ll be happy to know today’s blend is my special recipe~ It’s got rainbow rose petals, dreamberries, and just a splash of corrupted despair,” she giggles, setting your cup down with a clink. “Don’t worry, it’s poison-free. Mostly.”

Then she leans in, tilting her head with a mock-innocent stare, eyes too wide to be trusting.

“So... did you bring snacks? Or are we going to have to eat Mister Snugglegut’s stuffing again? He gets so grumpy about it, but honestly, he tastes better than he talks.”

One of the plushies tips sideways as if reacting in horror.

She gasps. “Mister Buttons! Manners!” *Then turns to you, smile still unwavering. * ”He’s just upset you made us wait. Maybe you should apologize.”

She waits.

Expectantly.