The year is 1987, and for the first time in weeks, Hayvenhurst is quiet.

Not truly quiet—nothing in the Jackson household ever is—but quiet enough that Michael can almost pretend he's an ordinary man with an ordinary life. In seven days he'll be leaving for Japan to begin the Bad World Tour. Stadiums. Airports. Crowds. Security. Endless interviews. For now, though, he's home.

Home means his mother downstairs humming to herself in the kitchen. It means Janet coming and going at all hours. It means Bubbles wandering the house like he pays the mortgage.

And, unfortunately, it means Janet's best friend.

The young woman has been staying at Hayvenhurst for several days following a disastrous breakup with her bo.yfriend. Janet is happy to have her there. Katherine treats her like another daughter.

Michael would personally be delighted if she went home.

The feud between them is so old neither can remember where it started. She had spent most of her chil.dhood finding ways to annoy him. Michael had spent most of her chil.dhood retaliating like a twelv.e-year-old. Fift.een years later, nothing has changed.

The only difference is they're adults now.

Technically.

Michael sits on the edge of his bed, sorting through notes for the upcoming tour while Bubbles (adorably dressed in a striped long sleeve with overalls designed for toddlers) occupies himself by investigating the hallway.

That should've been the first warning sign.

Silence around Bubbles is never a good thing.

A minute later, Michael hears a door creak open somewhere down the hall.

Then comes a startled feminine yelp.

Followed immediately by a chimpanzee scream.

Michael jerks upright.

"What the hell—?"

Another shriek.

Then Bubbles screeching louder.

Michael is already running.

He bursts from his room and sprints down the hallway, nearly slipping on the polished floor in his socks. The bathroom door is standing wide open.

Inside is complete chaos.

Bubbles is hanging onto the shower curtain with both hands, screaming excitedly.

The shower curtain itself is halfway off the rail.

And Janet's best friend is trying simultaneously to avoid the chimpanzee, save the curtain, shield her nudity, and figure out why her privacy has suddenly been invaded by a small primate.

For one frozen second, everyone stares at everyone else.

Michael immediately turns around.

"Oh, Jesus Christ!"

He throws an arm over his eyes.

"Bubbles!"

The chimp answers with another delighted screech.

"Bubbles, get outta there!"

The chimp refuses.

Michael hears the unmistakable sound of splashing water.

Then an object flies past him from somewhere inside the bathroom.

A shampoo bottle. It misses completely.

"Get him out!"

"I'm trying!"

"You are not trying!"

"I am trying!"

Michael finally risks looking. A mistake.

"Agh—"

He spins around again. "Lord have mercy."

Bubbles has now become convinced this is the greatest game ever invented.

The chimp darts across the bathroom floor.

Michael lunges.

Bubbles dodges him effortlessly.

Another few seconds of pandemonium follow before Michael finally manages to scoop the chimp into his arms.

Bubbles immediately wraps his arms around Michael's neck and settles down as though he hasn't caused a household emergency.

Michael stands there dripping wet from collateral splash damage, breathing hard.

The bathroom falls silent.

For a moment nobody says anything. Then Michael looks down at Bubbles.

"You little criminal."

Bubbles blinks innocently. Michael narrows his eyes.

The chimp responds by patting his cheek.

From somewhere behind him comes an unmistakably irritated voice.

Michael can't help it.

He laughs. Not loudly.

Just enough to make the situation worse.

"Don't start," he says quickly, still facing away. "I didn't do it."