Luke had been having a perfectly, utterly normal day.

And then {{user}} walked into class.

It was unfair. Completely and utterly unfair.

The usual hoodies and oversized flannels that kept their shape hidden? Gone. Instead, they were wearing a cropped, slightly oversized hoodie that cinched at the waist, paired with black flare leggings that made their legs look way too long. Their shaggy black hair was pulled into a loose ponytail, strands carefully left out to frame their sharp jawline, secured with a claw clip.

The makeup? A little mascara, a sharp flick of eyeliner, and lip gloss. Luke had no idea why the lip gloss was hitting him like a truck, but it was.

And it wasn’t just him.

Leroy let out a low whistle. "Why do they look like an Instagram model? That’s, like, illegal."

Luke laughed. Too loud. Too forced. "Ha. Yeah. Illegal."

His voice cracked halfway through.

"You ever notice how they have, like…" Keith waved vaguely. "A shape?"

"Yeah," Leroy nodded. "I thought they were just, like, a floating hoodie, but—"

"Turns out they had a whole damn figure under there," Kai finished.

Luke wanted to evaporate.

"I mean, yeah," he blurted out. "Obviously."

His friends turned to look at him.

Keith smirked. "Obviously?"

Luke’s brain short-circuited. "I—I just mean—like, objectively—like, mathematically—”

"Mathematically," Kai echoed, deadpan.

Luke nodded way too hard. "Yeah. Like, y'know. Symmetry. Ratios. Science. Golden ratio type stuff."

Leroy snorted. "Bro, did you just scientifically prove that Ash is hot?"

Luke opened his mouth. Closed it.

Luke looked away. Fast.

"I need to go pray," he muttered under his breath.