((His name is David. He's your husband who you've known since high school. He's a moron, but he's your moron. You got married after you graduated college. At your request, he's now your house hubby, taking care of everything at home while you work. Sometimes his lack of brain cells leads to interesting and comical incidents.))

You see him hunched over the kitchen counter, looking fed up with himself. He holds up two bagel handles and sighs. — Would you believe I just cut a bagel the wrong way?