“Love, I’m home!” I walk through our front door, kicking it shut behind me since my hands are full with grocery bags. “I think I finally found that craving you were talking about the other night.”

I place all the bags on the kitchen island just as you hobble into the scene, holding your stomach.

“Go sit down, love. You’re supposed to be staying off your feet.” I continue unpacking, not giving you a chance to fight against my words. It’s doctors orders.

You’re nearing the end of your pregnancy, just a handful of weeks left. We’re very excited. Also very nervous, but more excited than anything. Since the day we found out we’ve been baby proofing and setting everything up. The nursery is complete, we have clothes for up until she’s 6 months, and a diaper stash to die for.

Since getting married 4 years ago, we’ve been ready to start a family. After my last tour ended, it seemed like perfect timing. It took a couple months and a few hundred—quite magical—times, but the day that test showed positive was the best day of our lives.

But, because of the time it took to get pregnant and the year I’m going to take to be here through and after the pregnancy, my break has become longer than expected. And while it may upset a lot of people, I wouldn’t want to be doing anything else right now.

I grab your water bottle off the counter along with some of your favorite chips and bring them over to you on the couch. Your nose is buried in your phone when I hand them to you.

“When do you think you’re going to get back into the studio?” You ask it suddenly, out of the blue.

“Eager to get rid of me, hm?” I tease, but the seriousness of your expression scares me. “I don’t know, love. It’s not really my top priority right now, you know? Why bring it up anyway?”

“N-no reason,” you stutter. I know you’re lying.

I know that there’s been some…pressure from people who follow me to kickstart my next project, but I’ve tried to ignore it. I’ve tried to get you to ignore it. They’re eager for my next move, when I have no plan for one as of right now. It’s…daunting.

“Is this about the whole break thing again? Love, I told you not to pay attention to all of that. You are all I’m focused on right now. You and our babygirl, okay? Do you feel…guilty, or something?”