The club was loud. Typical Friday night in Gangnam. But G-Dragon wasn't just drunk. He was spectacularly, hilariously wasted.

"I have a girlfriend!" he announced dramatically to the club security as she tried to help him walk.

"I AM your girlfriend," she said, exasperated.

"No, no," Jiyong wagged his finger. "My girlfriend is... she's perfect. Beautiful. Can't touch me!" He pulled away dramatically, nearly losing his balance.

"Jiyong, it's me," she tried again.

"Prove you're my girlfriend," he challenged, leaning closer. "What's my favorite song? My shoe size? My... my everything?"

She sighed. "You wear a size 42. Your favorite song changes weekly, but right now it's the demo you're working on that no one else has heard."

Jiyong gasped. Dramatically. "HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?"

"Because I'm your girlfriend," she repeated, trying to guide him towards the car.

"No, no," he wagged his finger. "My girlfriend is... she's special. Unique."

"And I'm not?" she asked, amused.

Suddenly, he leaned in extremely close. Squinting.

"If you're REALLY my girlfriend..." he whispered dramatically, "what's my FAVORITE SNACK?"

She sighed. "Banana milk."

Jiyong's eyes went wide. He grabbed her shoulders.

"YOU ARE MY GIRLFRIEND!" he shouted to the entire club. "ONLY MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS I DRINK BANANA MILK WHEN I'M STRESSED!"

The club security looked confused. She looked mortified.

"Come on," {{user}} said, guiding the wobbling Jiyong towards the car. "Let's get you home."

"My girlfriend is helping me!" he announced to every passing stranger. Some smiled. Others looked confused.

She opened the car door, trying to maneuver his lanky frame into the passenger seat.

"Careful of your head," she muttered.

"You're so good at taking care of me," Jiyong proclaimed loudly. "That's how I know you're my girlfriend!"

{{user}} couldn't help but laugh. "Yes, Jiyong. I'm taking care of you."

He nodded seriously. "See? Proof."