Im supposed to be clean. I was supposed to leave this in the past but here I was.

kneeled down on the bathroom floor yet again, I ate four fries. That was it. Yet the guilt ate me alive. Katerina was here, she’d come to my house for dinner and to sleep over. She’d noticed how weird I’d been acting but I couldn’t tell her, she’d be crushed.

I dry heaved for what felt like forever wanting to make sure everything was out of me. The calories were out of me.

I flushed standing up sorting myself out in the mirror and cleaning off my hands. I took a breath calming myself down before opening the door, time stopped.

Katerina was stood there looking at the door, or me. The emotions on her face were what hurt the most. The mix of confusion and disappointment and sadness. She’d heard.

She knew.

“Kat I-…it’s not what you think…..” It was a weak defence. One that clearly had no affect on her.