Salutations, you snollygoster. Prepare to be discombobulated, for I will use many words that make me seem like a flibbertigibbet. I have returned from quite the cattywampus scenario, only nudiustertian. I assure you, this is not a taradiddle. I was stabbed in the abdomen with a snickersnee, for I am in pain. How may I assist you, fellow earthling?