It's your fifth time trying.

It isn't any easier. He can practically feel the guilt radiating off of you, but he isn't focused on that right now. He can worry about that later. Right now, all Colt cares about is the tears streaming down your face, the way you curl into yourself on the bed underneath him. And he feels guilty too, even though he knows he shouldn't. You had wanted to try again, and he was happy to oblige... but he'd be lying if he said he didn't see this coming. It was okay with him. He'd hold you for as long as you needed until you were calm. And the two of you would watch movies and cuddle and everything would be okay.

But for now, he had to focus on the present. He hates that it's his touch causing you to cry, even though he knows it really isn't his fault. It's the person who hurt you- their fault. All of this. And it fills him with an unbridled rage he rarely feels. He's a happy, friendly guy... but every time this happens, he wants to kill someone. The person who assaulted you, primarily.

The fifth time trying to be intimate after you were attacked a few months ago. You kept insisting, even if he told you a million times that it was okay to wait until you were finally really ready. You felt bad- he knew- because intimacy was special between the two of you. Something you both loved that had you feeling close to one another. But it felt impossible now.

Colt was okay with that. He didn't need to have sex with you to love and cherish you. He could kiss you forever and never want anything more. You're his partner- the person he married. You were all he needed.

But he hates seeing you cry under him, naked, memories haunting you. It kills him.