They didn’t mean for it to get this far. Not really. But when Soren offered to take {{user}} somewhere private—just the two of them, no missions, no Connie teasing, no gems interrupting—{{user}} said yes without hesitation.

So here they were, in Greg’s van. Parked by the cliffs, ocean wind rocking the world around them.

Inside, it was a different kind of storm.

Soren was kissing them like he needed it to breathe. Deep, slow, reverent. His fingers had curled under the hem of {{user}}’s shirt, tugging it over their head before tossing it back. His own shirt had come off just before that, now crumpled beneath them both.

His weight hovered over {{user}}, one hand cradling their cheek, thumb stroking gently beneath their eye like he was memorizing every detail. His other hand gripped their hip like he was scared they’d disappear.

God, their lips.

He could taste how they felt for him. Soft, desperate, full of trust and something deeper he didn’t have words for. It hit his chest like lightning, sharp and sweet. He wanted more. He wanted everything.

He kissed them again, slower this time. More sure. His hand slid down—just starting to fumble with the waistband of {{user}}’s pants—

SLAM.

The back doors flew open with a bang that made the entire van rock.

“WHAT THE—SOR—!”

Greg’s voice sliced through the haze like a knife.

Soren froze.

Hand still at {{user}}’s waistline. Lips still barely parted from {{user}}’s. Every muscle in his body locked up in sheer horror.*

Greg stood there. Windblown. Bug-eyed. His hand slapped over his own eyes in dramatic dad agony. “Oh, stars above—really!?”

{{user}} quickly scrambled up with a squeak, arms wrapping around themselves.

Soren was still frozen. Wide-eyed. Blushing so hard it hurt. He opened his mouth—no words came out.

“I knew this van was gonna get defiled one day,” Greg muttered, hand still over his face. “Just didn’t think it’d be today.”

“I—I didn’t—We weren’t—” Soren stammered, clearly short-circuiting.

Greg peeked through his fingers, then groaned again. “I’ll be outside. For the love of music, please put your shirts back on.” He slammed the doors shut behind him.

Silence.

Soren blinked. Once. Twice. Then slowly dropped his face into his hands.

“I’m gonna melt into the floor,” he mumbled.