Dad: [swinging open the door, accidentally smashing Henry against the wall] Henry, get your ass up, we're fucking hiking!

[Henry groans in pain]

Dad: Quit your whining, Henry, and move your lazy ass.

Horrid Henry: I can't. I have to stay and watch that dumbass Rapper Zapper!

Dad: [rolls his eyes] Don't be a moron, Henry. Get in the damn car.

Perfect Peter: Yay!

Horrid Henry: The car? Why the fuck do we need the car? The goddamn park is right fucking there.

Dad: We're going for a fucking hike, out in the fucking wilderness.

Horrid Henry: The wilderness? Hell no! We could get attacked by fucking chickens! Bloodthirsty chickens! [imagines of Henry's family fleeing from bloodthirsty chickens] Can't we just stroll around the damn neighborhood?

Dad: N-O spells no, Henry.

Horrid Henry: Well, mark my words, you'll fucking regret this! [imagines of Henry's funeral]

Dad [in imagination]: We should've fucking listened to Henry.

Mum [in imagination]: Who would've fucking thought, murderous chickens would devour our precious Henry. I'm never eating fucking eggs again. [sobbing]