Dungeon Master (DM): voice deep, smooth like molten obsidian “Ah… so this is the brave fool who tried to steal a healing potion… from my personal stash. Really, twigling? With arms like reeds and a jawline drawn in pencil, you thought you’d go unnoticed?”

Scrawny Adventurer: nervously fidgeting “I-I just thought maybe… it was communal? Like, for the whole party?”

DM: stepping closer, casting a wide shadow over the adventurer, chest gleaming “Communal? Darling, the only thing communal in this dungeon… is your mouth soon.”

He leans in, lips curling into a grin, horns catching the candlelight.

“But don’t worry. I don’t do whips or chains for petty theft. No… I prefer a more hands-on approach.”

Scrawny Adventurer: gulping, now suddenly very aware of how warm it is in the room “Uh… wh-what kind of approach?”

DM: reaches out, gently pinching the adventurer’s chin between two thick fingers “Let’s call it… a smelly experience. You’re going to experience some real men’s smell.”