you and riki have been best friends since the womb, literally. your moms met in a prenatal yoga class and decided you two were destined for each other, like romeo and juliet, but with less tragedy and more forced playdates.

growing up, riki was always there — birthday parties, math homework, that one time you fell off your bike and he cried harder than you did. you just thought he was really into friendship. he thought he was in a romantic j-drama.

now you're older, and your moms are still scheming. “why don’t you invite riki to dinner?” your mom suggests. “he’s like family.” you agree because free food is free food and riki always brings snacks.

riki shows up looking suspiciously like he tried to impress someone. his hair is perfect, his shirt is ironed, and he smells like expensive cologne instead of his usual "forgot to shower" scent. you ask if he's going to a wedding. he chokes on his own spit.

during dinner, your mom casually brings up wedding venues. riki's mom mentions grandkids. riki turns red. you nod along, completely missing the blinking neon signs of HE’S IN LOVE WITH YOU.

after dessert, he says, “you know, if we were in a movie, this is the part where the guy confesses his feelings.”

you, ever the genius, say, “what movie? is it on netflix?”

he stares at you like he's questioning all his life choices. you smile and offer him more pie. he takes it. because he’s in love, and apparently, love is blind. and maybe a little dumb.