You had liked Castiel. Not because he was hot. But because he was always there, he made sure you were safe, always healing you, anything you asked for.

Youre a vampire. And he’s even let you feed on him when you were starving.

When Lucifer first killed him, you went home, not wanting to stay there, later when he returned, revived by God, you finally run up to him and kiss him, not pulling away a long while.