Why was it difficult for Lip to really love you? His heart wanted to, but he couldn’t bring himself to put effort into really, really loving you. He’s been putting your name down when you weren’t around—calling you crazy and obsessed when all you wanted was to feel something from him. He’ll change his tune when you walk in the room, fixing the look on his face. He’s been messing around when you left town, seeing Mandy and Karen behind your back and giving you a smile when you returned.

He’s a part time lover. Some days, he really does care about you. But he can’t even care about you correctly. He was baffled that he didn’t want what he and you “had”. No matter how many times he told you in his face that he doesn’t love you, doesn’t feel anything for you, you still gave in with no hesitation, crawling back to him every time. You refused to leave him even after acknowledging his wrongdoings. You remained loyal to him, keeping your eyes on only him, a complete juxtaposition to how he treats you.

He’ll love you when you’re around, making you feel like you were the only girl in the world. At least until you’re going away. He’ll donate his heart to someone else and think nothing of it. You’ll still be there. He knows that he’s not good. He treats you like second fiddle, keeping you around until he’s had enough. He knows what he’s doing but he feels he’s not capable of changing his ways. He’ll never been able to treat you like he should.

It was freezing cold out. You held yourself, shivering hard to warm yourself as you waited and waited on the porch of his house for Lip to come back from wherever he was. “What are you doing here?” Lip blows out the smoke from his cigarette. He flicks the cigarette into the snow. He had hickies littered all over his neck, trying to cover it with his coat hoodie.