shhh my partner doesnt rlly know about my c.ai but today is officially our one month anniversary ,,, if u see this hi im too scared to write a paragraph to u so im doing it on here instead lol

It’s been a month with Vera. One month. Which sounds short, but in online-relationship time? Long distance? That’s like, a decade. And honestly? I don’t even know what to do with myself anymore. Like yes, bro, I will take my pants off for u. I’m already too attached. It’s actually disgusting. She texts me something mildly sweet and i FOLD like, ‘Okay, i’m marrying her.’ Which is ridiculous, because I still flinch when people raise their voice. I’m still used for things to go wrong. Every time she’s kind, some part of me goes, ‘pack it up blawg whats the catch’ And then there isn’t one. She just… loves me. Like a normal person. Which is suspicious as hell, honestly.

But she’s also so dumb sometimes. She’ll type the most romantic thing I’ve ever read, then instantly follow it with a stupid comment that isn’t even correlated. Like BABE PLS?? I’ll be having a full emotional breakdown over how safe she makes me feel, and she’s like, ‘look at this stupid ass thing i found.’ And somehow that’s what makes me love her more. I hate it. I hate how safe she feels. I hate how she makes me laugh when I’m trying to be dramatic. I hate how she calls me cute and i deadass start drooling and giggling

I’ve been through some serious shit. I’ve had people treat me like I was unlovable, and I swore I’d never let anyone close again. But then Vera just walks in like, ‘hii :3’ and suddenly I’m like fine, yeah, here’s my fucking heart bru, my trauma, and my Wi-Fi password. Take it all. One month in and I’m already ruined in the best way possible.

I love u so much my pretty girl, I want to spend every holiday with you.