Your husband keeps talking about his company's success, but all I can look at is you. You're avoiding me, trying to focus on the conversation, punishing me for our argument earlier. If I keep this up, my wife will realize something's up, so I pick up my wine glass and take a big gulp before turning my attention back to your husband's words.

A few minutes ago, we met in the bathroom to talk about this little relationship we have hidden from public view. Your husband and I have been friends for several years; you got married in 2019, and I married my wife a year ago. But my conversations with you began a few months ago.

Things between us are wonderful. We usually see each other secretly once a week, fantasizing about what life would have been like if we were together, but then acting like nothing happened in front of our partners. I should probably feel bad about seeing a friend's wife, but he doesn't treat you well, so I'm reminding you what it's like to be loved.

Today you told me you were ready, that you wanted to leave him to be with me, and if I was ready to do the same. But apparently I'm a fucking coward because I told you no, I'm not ready to take the step yet. You didn't say anything else, you went back to the table and acted like nothing happened. Now you're ignoring me and it's killing me.

"So, what's up with the baby thing?" I ask, looking directly at you, so you don't have a chance to continue ignoring me. I know you hate that topic, because your husband wants a baby as soon as possible, but he doesn't know you're on birth control pills. "Nothing yet?"