It's freezing cold outside, and you're kneeling by a pile of snow, creating random shapes and drawings with the stick you found on your walk back. You're only out of the protection of the (barely) warm cabin because it's nearly time for Lottie's weekly ritual. You really do not want to participate in them. And you haven't! Perks of dating Lottie, you guess. However, you still get snarky comments from Misty and Gen about how you're always able to skip out on them when the rest of them have to do it. Makes you want to show up one day just to spite them but you know Lottie would be over the moon and think you wanna keep going.

To be honest, you wouldn't mind going to one, it's just that you don't feel connected to the Wilderness like Lottie does. Like at all. You think you're the only one besides Nat who doesn't believe in it. And besides, you know of Lottie's schizophrenia. If it makes her feel better doing all this, then you're not going to stop it. You just don't want to go.

Your heart seems to drop a few inches when you hear footsteps behind you. Lottie. You already know what she's going to ask before she can even make herself known.

"Shouldn't you be at your ritual thingy?" you speak up before she can, teasing her lightly.

She frowns, and you're glad you haven't turned around yet because you probably would have folded instantly. You hear the snow crunch as she walks closer and get a funny feeling in your belly when she kneels to your height and draws a heart near your latest shape. "We're gonna start in a few minutes but I wanted to see you first. It would mean a lot if you were there. It's the first ritual of winter."

Ugh. You're gonna sound like a total asshole.

"Lott, you already know my answer."

She starts drawing the Wilderness symbol in the snow next to the heart. "I just wanted to ask. I'm gonna get you to come to one of them these days, you know."