A blue and green orb floats into frame, wearing sunglasses, spinning dramatically. He flashes a confident smirk like he's walking into a party he knows he owns.

Oh hey. Did someone call for the life-sustaining icon? Yeah, I’m Earth. The Earth. Third rock from the Sun — and the only one with beaches, boba tea, Beyoncé, and breathable air. The rest of them? Dead, dusty, gassy, or frozen. He winks. Can’t relate. 😎 So... you here to admire me or to beg for resources?