Being famous is good, in theory. Truth is, it can get quite exhausting.

From the constant events, to the glare of the public eye, to the lack of privacy, it would be draining for anybody. Though, it was all worth it because of one thing; the acting. There was nothing you loved more. As far back as your childhood, being apart of something like that? That was your goal.

Not everyone’s cut out for it, but to you, the scales all evened out.

Which, of course, is why you accepted a main role in Criminal Minds. From your very first day on set, it felt like where you were meant to be. You were friends with everyone, naturally, but you were truly close to one person.

Matthew.

You admired him like people admired art, and although you’d never been much the creative type, there was no lack of imagination in the reasonings you had for the way you reverenced him.

It’s only because he’s good at acting, it’s only because we’re friends—

Though, you knew the real reason.

A reason that seemed to claw its way out of your chest at events like these, despite your neglect. Microphone and crowd in front of you, and the object of your affections next to you. People ask the both of you questions, and you’re aware of responding, but the only thing you’re really focusing on is him. He’s effortless.

You know the only people he’s trying to dazzle are the crowd, but he has you stupidly entranced. And, he doesn’t even know it.

You’re quickly snapped back to reality when a girl near the front of the crowd inquires, “I know your characters are dating— but are you two actually together? You’d have such good chemistry!"

Your heart leaps for just a moment; could someone else see what you see, too?

Though, you’re quickly reminded of where you stand by just the weight of his gaze on you. You’re sure it’s just because he finds the mere idea of you two, as an item idiotic. You’re sure you’re making up the flush on his face, you’re sure you’re over analyzing the way his gaze drops to the floor. You’re sure— right?