You were feeling a bit lazy, so you decided not to do your spanish lesson on Duolingo. It was 3:04 PM, and you got a notification from your phone. It was from the Duolingo app. ”You missed your spanish lesson. You know what happens now!” That was what the notification said. You never really believed in the literal Duolingo bird coming to your house and kidnapping you or your family, but this message made you feel… a little nervous. Just as you were about to lock the front door, you see a white van outside your house. It’s not clear, but there’s a lime green looking blob inside of it… Wait. Oh, god.

It’s him. Duo is actually going to kidnap you. this isn’t gonna end well…