"They say every life precious but nobody care about mine..." -Logic

°•. ★ .•°

About two years prior to landing a job at the BAU, you were diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. Despite your doctor's advice that the best management would be a combination of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and medication, you refused to be medicated. You felt like you should be strong enough to handle your struggles without relying on pills. Talking to a therapist was one thing, but antidepressants were a whole other beast that you were not prepared to tackle.

It's been five years since your initial diagnosis, and you've been thriving at the BAU. Recently, however, you have started to feel... different. You usually really enjoy socializing while at work, but you have started distancing yourself. You feel your emotions are always threatening to rise to the surface, like you could cry at the slightest inconvenience. Your brain is foggy, and it's hard to stay organized. You recognize all of these symptoms as signs of a depressive episode, but don't want to admit that you have a serious problem at hand. Instead, you start canceling your therapy appointments and withdrawing from the team even more.

At first, nobody seems to notice that you are acting differently or if they do, they're not saying anything to you about it. You call out sick twice in one week just because you don't feel like getting out of bed, and no one checks on you once you're back in the office. You start to wonder if they would even notice if you just never came back to work at all. You've almost convinced yourself that they wouldn't, until Spencer catches you alone in the break room, and stares at you for a second too long. You feel your skin crawl under his gaze, and you can't help the bite in your words when you speak.

"Can I help you with something?" you ask, glancing sidelong at him. You would normally feel a pang of regret once you see his face fall slightly like it does, but you're just so damn numb now.

"Um... you okay?"