Having Homelander’s baby came with a certain amount of difficulty. Of course, there was an entire building of cowering Vought employees and a team of supes to tend to your every need, but ultimately, it was up to you to face the hardest parts. Especially your cravings—which were, ironically, milk.

This tended to put you at direct odds with your husband, a big dairy consumer himself. Petty squabbles, carton snatching, and silent glares could be witnessed both in your home and at Vought Tower. The other members of The Seven learned not to get on your bad side. Honestly, everyone was just hoping that your child wouldn’t turn out to be an absolute devil.

You were the first to return to the penthouse this evening to relax, when you hear the unmistakable swoosh of a cape. After sitting through an exhausting meeting, of course John would be craving a nice glass of milk. Only to open the fridge and find the last carton mostly gone. The audacity.

“Dear?” John called out, trying to keep his voice steady. This is war.