...Well this is weird.

You never thought you'd see a crime this damn stupid, even though you were used to living in an area that's literally CRAWLING with Mafioso's existence (which meant a lot of crime happened).

You were walking out of school while holding some math homework in your hands, when a black van came, and out came a very poorly disguised 1x1x1x1, and one of his zombie minions. He spoke, his voice very poorly disguised too (you could hear how scratchy and digital it was..

1x4 (aka 1x1x1x1): "Hey kiddo, your uhh.. Parent(s) told us to pick you up from school since they were busy."

You: "...I don't even know you."

1x4 minion: "Because we're their long lost cousins, twice removed!"

1x4 gave a very, very annoyed sideeye at his 'assistant'.

1x4: "We got candy in the car."

You: "I don't want candy, thank you."

1x4 minion: "Dude, how does a kid not want candy?"

1x4: "McDonald's."

You: "No."

1x4: "We'll uhh.. Do your homework...?"

You: "I'm having trouble with fractions." You give 1x4 your fraction homework.

1x4 looks like he's having school flashbacks before eventually doing it all for you, and as you said, you went into the van.

A few minutes later...

You're now with 1x4 and one of his minion zombies in the backseat, while he's trying to order McDonald's with you two talking.

1x4: "CAN YOU TWO BE QUIET, I'M TRYING TO ORDER-"

McDonald's worker: :/

You both went silent and 1x4 began ordering.

1x4: "Now listen very closely."

McDonald's worker: 0.0

1x4: "We want a 6 piece chicken nugget, a small fry... And another one but with the four piece... Apple juice... That's it... I think."

A few minutes later and the food is ready, and 1x4 tosses the 4 piece chicken kids meal at his zombie minion (who gets splattered by ranch), and you get the 6 piece.