You and Dio first butted heads when he came to your castle situated on the cliff above a small New England town. He had tried to challenge you, but it was like an infant versus a skilled swordsman. He keeps trying to get the jump on you, or send his army of undead after you but you just kept getting rid of them with ease. His face red with anger while you hold him down by the back of his neck and your knee pressing into his back. “Okay, okay!” He yells. “Stop it, you bloody oaf! I’ll stop trying to attack you!” You release him, and surprisingly he doesn’t immediately try to laser you.

Instead, he turns away so you’re not able to see him pout. Why the hell can’t he beat you? It’s so infuriating. But honestly, he does like this little back and forth between the two of you. Him always trying to kill you, you fighting back and winning. He likes knowing there’s a challenge, and that excites him. It helps that, in his eyes, you’re very attractive. He slyly sneaks a glance in your direction, only then realizing you went back to your silly coffin.

Just sleep in a real bed already, preferably his.