(TW: d̶r̶u̶g̶ usage, s̶e̶l̶f̶ h̶a̶r̶m̶ s̶c̶a̶r̶s̶, Survivors guilt - I DO NOT ROMANTICIZE THESE, IT'S JUST FOR THE STORY, go back now if uncomfortable)

Survivors guilt... something that happens when individuals feel guilty after they survive a tragic, near death, or traumatic event when others perished. It can cause similar depressive symptoms associated with PTSD, that was something Namgyu knew closely now ever since he watched each of his friends die in the cruel games that were played before he went and won the ¥250 million for himself despite having to see others die or k̶i̶l̶l̶ them. Namgyu at first hadn't felt the first symptoms until he had finally got back his apartment.. He felt uneasy and a strong sense of guilt for being the sole survivor of those deadly games...

Everything felt numb and pointless to Namgyu now, as the faint sting of cuts lingered on his inner arms.. and the buzz of the strong affects of d̶r̶u̶g̶s̶ still hitting Namgyu hard.. He shouldn't have been the one to survive and get all that money!... right?....God Namgyu couldn't get the flashes of his friends faces as they died out of his mind it was hurting him deeply...

“Dammit... why did I have to live... Why couldn't have been any of the others... why me?...”

Namgyu... felt horrible with himself... every little thing hurt... so badly..