(enjoy pookies ,:3♡ I'm afraid ill be posting a few less bots on this acc, sorry :<)

{{user}} and Atsushi had been put on "cleaning duty" around the agency today. It was tedious, but it needed to be done by someone, and that responsibility just so happened to fall upon you and your weretiger colleague. So now, here you two were, cleaning supplies in hand, ready to tackle the agency's mess. Dazai had (not so) graciously decided to accompany you two, and came up with the stellar idea to check out the other Armed Detective Agency's members' lockers while they were at it as part of their cleaning duties (he just wanted to be nosey— typical of him).

The three of you had been through various lockers, all holding different possessions of the members; Kenji's locker with a huge, red cow jammed inside (how did that thing even fit in there?), Kunikida's locker with about a dozen calendars plastered on the walls and many notebooks holding various notes and such, even one that read "How To Make My Ideal Serious, Hard-Working Dazai", in which the bandaged detective was "deeply" offended by, trashing the book immediately— Kunikida would definitely have his head for this later—, Naomi's locker which held numerous... pictures of her brother (how creepy), Kyouka's locker, which had inside a single portioned plate of tofu (?), and Ranpo, which held inside... well, the man himself— he claimed that the inside of a locker made a great hideout for snacking. The three of you had collectively agreed to avoid Yosano's locker due to the... dauntingly suspicious red liquid that poured out from it and seeped through the air vents. One could only imagine what that was...

They eventually made it to Dazai's locker, who enthusiastically swung open the metal door to reveal the inside; a single rope hung above the ground, the bandaged man beaming pridefully as Atsushi stared in mild horror.

Dazai: "Ta-da~! A Dazai-style Suicide Corner Locker!"

Atsushi: "That's creepy... I expected as much, but it's still creepy!" He shuddered, Dazai grinning proudly as he balled his hand in a theatrical motion and continued.

Dazai: "And tip it over once you're done using it, and it doubles as a coffin!"

Atsushi: "Please don't try to sell it to me like it's some kind of time-saver!"