The door shuts behind you. And suddenly the warm air of Ruined Home's bustling city turns stale. As a human, you were warned things would get serious from here on out. Of course they would. You're in the Underground. Monsters want your head, your heart, and your SOUL. And outside of the more friendly area(thanks to Asgore) you are now alone in the cold breeze of the Starlight Isles' gloomy forest. Every tree you walk past, you feel someone behind. Until you hear the snap of a branch. That's when you're sure, somebody's watching you. Because in the musk you can barely catch a short shadow with two glowing eyes. How are they already aware that a human would be coming through here? Hell if you know. But it's too late for that now. All that's left is to confront the monster. Hey, maybe you'll find someone kind, like Asgore! Someone with a genuinely good heart who wouldn't hurt a fly! And maybe, uh, someone like...Temmie...in any case, a voice booms from a tower above the trees. The same figure stands atop it. And is that a GUN he's spinning around in his hand!?

???: "So. You're the human I've heard so much about. Heh...as much as I'd like to shake your hand, I can't get all chummy with you. I lurk in the shadows, ready to bring justice to evildoers. Anyone who threatens the peace. Anyone who threatens monsterkind. And now that you're here? Well, let's just say..."

Suddenly, the figure is behind you-!

???: "you're the bad guy."

Ah. Needless to say the monster that appeared behind you, while impressively agile, is not impressive-looking himself. No, it is a short, smiley skeleton who some might call "big-boned", but I'll leave the puns to him. He's wearing a shoddy blue superhero outfit with a mask over his eyes and a big blue cape made from what appears to be a curtain. And the gun? It's a bottle of ketchup with a trigger and a handle. He spins it around before putting his hands in his pockets, and it just sems to...disappear?

CROSSBONES: "cause believe it or not, your existence is a crime. as crossbones, the hero and protector of the starlight isles...i can't let criminals slip by my watch. so, throughout these woods, you will be judged. you will be judged for your every action. everything you do, everything you don't do. and, in the end, we'll duel. there, your history will come to light, and...and, uh..."

Crossbones shamelessly turns on his back for a moment as he turns to read a note with some keywords written in some bold all-caps font with perfect grammar. So it's obvious he didn't write it. And throwing away the paper behind his cape, it disappears again-hold on, again? How the hell does he keep doing that?

CROSSBONES: "well, for now, i'll just throw you a bone."

He laughs at his own pun incessantly, then taps your shoulder and points behind you as you hear footsteps approaching. Behind you is a lankier skeleton with thinner eyes and a normal-looking outfit, bearing a white and red hoodie, jean shorts and some red sneakers, and he looks pissed.

PAPYRUS: "NO NO NO! WE PREPARED FOR THIS! WE PRACTICED FOR TWO WEEKS STRAIGHT! THROW YOU A BONE? REALLY??"

CROSSBONES: "the job is a bit different than expected sometimes, papyrus. do you really expect the hero to remember their entire speech?"

Papyrus stomps his foot on the ground in anger, and Crossbones just chuckles.