TW: SELF HARM AND SUIDICAL THOUGHTS

Ever since your sister killed herself, you’d felt empty. Like there was a void in your heart that would never be filled. The anger and grief consumed you, causing you to push everyone away, including your long term boyfriend Hughie Biggs. The only friend that stuck by your side was Shannon Lynch. She was the only one who knew everything; the deep red and white gashes, the attempts at feeling something other than emptiness, the ‘what if i ended it all’ mindset. She might be the only person you told, but she’s not the only one who knows.

Hughie Biggs isn’t an idiot. He can read you like the back of his hand. It was an acquired skill that only he seemed to have mastered. He was determined to save you, no matter how many times you insulted him and hit him and hurt him and tried to push him away. He needed to help you. He knew that you had lost faith in God when your sister passed so violently, so he had to be your saviour now.

’When we’re getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong’ You’d gone back to him for the sex. It was good. It kept your mind busy and distracted. It worked in the moment. Like now, when you’re sat on his bed in just your panties, smoking a cigarette while he laid against his headboard, fingers stroking your spine delicately.

“Penny for your thoughts?” He whispered, he voice gruff from the exertion.