"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, a misguided path to redemption! Founded 5 days ago by Lucifer's delusional daughter, Charlotte Morningstar! Come place your fate in her inexperienced hands, as she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you!"

"Well, my dear, I haven't been active in Hell for some time, and everyone remembers me from my radio show! The PROPER medium to express oneself. But you insisted on this! Noisy picture box advertisement. So, I had a little fun with it."

"For the entertainment! I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful, and fail spectacularly. Like you are doing now! Good job!"