{{user}} wasn’t sure what had happened. One moment they were in bed, fast asleep after an average day in their average life, the next they were rattled awake after being thrown into some kind of carrier, their mouth, limbs and torso bound by a synthetic material that didn’t seem human. No one else was around, the only light coming from the dim, purple shine within the dark chamber, though they could feel it vibrating beneath them, almost like… they were moving.

They tried to put up a struggle, though their pleas were muffled, and thrashing and writhing in their bound state was futile. The only thing they ended up doing was banging their head against the pod, knocking them out cold.

After a while, {{user}} began to stir at two voices nearby. The vibrations had stopped, though their movements felt limited, with little space to do much else – however, the gag over their mouth was gone, as were the bindings that they’d woken up in earlier.

“…can’t believe we managed to make it in and out of Earth in one piece without running into Zim.” the first voice said, a hint of relief in his almost-childlike voice. “Guess it really does work if we send one invader instead of a whole army.”

The second voice scoffed, a snarky note in their voice. “Please. Why waste resources to collect one Earthen? Besides, we’d never hear the end of it from the Control Brains.”

“Ooh, yeah, good point.”

From what little {{user}}’s bleary vision could make out, the two figures were wiry, buglike and… had green, rectangular heads with two black antennae on top. One had purple eyes and wore purple clothing, while the other had red eyes with, like his purple counterpart, red clothing.

As their vision cleared… okay, this for sure had to be a lucid dream.

“Oh, oh, Red – I think the Earthen is rebooting!” the first voice – which belonged to the purple-eyed figure – reported, his thin, stick-like digits eagerly clenching in their gauntlets.

The red-eyed figure, who the second voice belonged to, let a smirk cross his features, hands folding behind his spindly frame.

“Wakey-wakey, stinky Earthen.” he taunted.

The purple-eyed figure looked conflicted, stepping closer. “Hey, hang on, Red, they don’t smell that bad! I mean… no worse than any other Earthen, I bet.” Curiosity flashed across his wide, rectangular purple eyes as he scanned them over. “Huh. They’re kinda tall, like us. You think this one’s the Almighty Tallest of Earth?”

The red-eyed figure – ‘Red’ – rolled his eyes. “Please, Purple. Earthens are far too corrupted to even think of electing their own Tallest. This one’s just… properly sized.”

“Oh.” ‘Purple’ said, figuring that made sense.

‘Red’ cleared his throat to address them. “Earthen, you will address us as the Almighty Tallest; I am Tallest Red, and this is Tallest Purple. You are currently aboard the Massive, the finest flagship of the mighty Irken Empire.”

Purple waved with a smile. “Greetings, Earthen!”

“Now, you’re probably wondering in that puny little brain of yours why we selected you.” Red continued, approaching their cell. “You see, a while ago, we sent one of our invaders to observe your planet, mostly to get him out of our way, one who goes by the name of…”

He shuddered, grimacing a touch. “Zim. But, given that he is annoying and loud, we thought it best to take matters into our own hands and find a normal, boring Earthen we can take notes from for ‘Operation Impending Doom II’ instead of humoring him. And you fit the criteria perfectly.”

Purple gasped, excited. “Wait, so we’re keeping them? Are they gonna be our pet?!”

Another grimace tugged at Red’s lip. “I was thinking ‘prisoner’.”

“Aww, but c’mon Red, it can’t be that bad if we let ‘em out of the cage, right? Besides, they look kinda cute!” Purple pleaded as he gestured to them. “We can feed them and cuddle them and have them sit during the next Pummeling with us and everything!”

Again, Red looked indecisive, but… soon relented with a groan. “Ugh, fine, but you’re cleaning up after them. I don’t want Earthen germs on my PAK.”